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BDSM guest author Tilly Greene




Pain does NOT have to play a part in BDSM Books
by Tilly Greene

Let me start this conversation by laying out the basic information you all probably already know but just so were all on the same page:  BDSM is an acronym for Bondage, Discipline, Sadism and Masochism.  Subcultures have split this up further with B/D [bondage/discipline], D/s [Domination/submission] and S&M [Sadism/masochism].

I should also say (actually write) that I need you to remember I’m talking fictionally here, FICTION, not real life.


A writer has a few jobs to do while writing erotic romances, especially when BDSM is involved.  We need to keep the romance moving along with the sex and all with a viable plot running through.  Yes, I know, an actual PLOT!  Another steadfast rule is to not alienate the reader by pushing too many sexual buttons and for me that means not bringing the ugly, as in pain, degradation and humiliation, aspects of the culture that are historically attached to BDSM.

So how can that be possible if it’s labeled BDSM?  Well, let’s take it by group and I’ll show you.

Arms tied with rope and pull behind the back, chained to a wall above their head or handcuffed to the headboard, I could go on but basically what I’m talking about is bondage, the act of holding someone right where they’re placed.  They’re immobile, vulnerable and ready for whatever their lover/s wants to treat them to which should be an incredible act of passion.  Toys may or may not be involved, but it’s the act of being secured that’s the main activity in this group.  The exchange of trust is huge and needs to be addressed at some point before the scene gets going.  There could be some sweat, panting and sore muscles, but pain is not necessary to offer excitement and a glorious climax to readers.

Discipline is another you’d think there was no chance for anything other than pain, but that would be wrong.  Spanking on the backside does not need to bring pain, a sting of delight, yes, but not pain.  A slap from the hand or a tap from a paddle to the rear end wouldn’t either.  A surprise to the pain query is when it comes to whips.  They bring as much physical discomfort as the wielder wants to deliver in the discipline quest, which can often be more a mental tease than an actual strike.  Just think about reading how a dominant strokes the straps of their whip across the tender flesh of a lover, raising gooseflesh and causing them to gasp for breath.  No pain need be involved with that whip, paddle or hand usage, just anticipation of pleasure and subtle strokes.

B/D was fairly straight forward, things get a little more dicey when it comes to domination and submission, sorry, Domination/submission, no, Dom/sub or is it D/s?   Whatever the label, the capital D says it all.  They’re the one in control of the game but don’t despair, the small s folks hold the power in the grip of their tightly clenched hands.  This is the group that brings together both verbal and physical along with games and rules.  Bringing these things along with the plot, sex and romance is a big job, a complicated dance, but totally doable.  My writer side says:  Stay where I put you, do exactly as I say and I’ll please you, make a move or say something out of turn and I’ll lay a tap on your bodacious backside.  The potential for pain is present and only comes into play if the writer brings it in.

And now it’s time to attack the last group, S&M, sadism and masochism.  Can a writer keep pain out of S&M games?  Yes, of course we can, anything can be done through words but it is a very tall order and one I don’t think I could pull off.  Why?  Pain is a requirement for a sadomasochist interaction so the verbiage would need to be chosen with great care to impart pain without using specifics.  Actually, you may or may not know, but there is a way to lie with words and that would be the way I’d go if I wrote a story involving S&M.

Despite the reputation of pain, degradation and humiliation, not all writers approach writing BDSM books with those results in their plot.  S&M is a line I as a writer can’t and won’t cross, but I can soften, push and erase the edges of B/D and D/s while holding onto their firm rules so I’ll stick to them.  A hint for the novice BDSM reader to find something they’d like to try is to check the blurbs for hints of how far it goes or the author’s website for tags.  BDSM is a moniker many shy away from because of longstanding misinformation, but there are some wonderfully rewarding books to delve into so don’t be put off, give a few a try and decide for yourself.

While traveling, Tilly Greene researches and writes erotica and erotic romance novels in a variety of genres and sub-genres.  Every day she looks forward to writing about women who are independent and confident, the men who love them, and their twisting passionate path to each other.

Tilly Greene
Scorching romances full of twists, turns and ties.

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LEATHER BRIDE by Tilly Greene
Contemporary Erotic Romance + Fetish, Exhibitionism and Bondage

Published by Ellora’s Cave

There are two things on Mimi’s mind—her lover Rick, and how he’s finally given in and bound her. Everything is wonderful until a mysterious trip calls him away.

Mimi tries to back out of walking the runway at the Safe, Sane and Consensually Wild fashion show, where she and her lover were set to model leather goods. She’s the muse behind the collection and the designer, her friend, won’t hear of her not modeling.

A misunderstanding threatens to tear them apart, but a fashion show could bring Mimi and Rick closer together.

WARNING! Leather Bride has lots of sex and some of it involves leather and toys.

An excerpt can be read here.

Comments

  1. Thank you so much for having me here today Bitten Gals!

    Tilly

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's nice to hear someone else likes, what I call 'light' BDSM. Good post!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thank you darlin' and for the RT :-) No pain can still mean seriously HOT!

    ReplyDelete

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