Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Fashionably Dead by Robyn Peterman ~ Review

Title: Fashionably Dead (Hot Damned #1)

Author: Robyn Peterman
Genre: Urban Fantasy, Paranormal Romance
Length: 323 pages
Publisher: Indie
Release Date: September 2, 2013
Source: Purchase
Rating: 3
Heat Rating: 4
Reviewed by: Jasmyn

Vampyres don’t exist. They absolutely do not exist.

At least I didn’t think they did ‘til I tried to quit smoking and ended up Undead. Who in the hell did I screw over in a former life that my getting healthy equates with dead?

Now I’m a Vampyre. Yes, we exist whether we want to or not. However, I have to admit, the perks aren’t bad. My girls no longer jiggle, my ass is higher than a kite and the latest Prada keeps finding its way to my wardrobe. On the downside, I’m stuck with an obscenely profane Guardian Angel who looks like Oprah and a Fairy Fighting Coach who’s teaching me to annihilate like the Terminator.

To complicate matters, my libido has increased to Vampyric proportions and my attraction to a hotter than Satan’s underpants killer rogue Vampyre is not only dangerous . . . it’s possibly deadly. For real dead. Permanent death isn’t on my agenda. Avoiding him is my only option. Of course, since he thinks I’m his, it’s easier said than done. Like THAT’S not enough to deal with, all the other Vampyres think I’m some sort of Chosen One.

Holy Hell, if I’m in charge of saving an entire race of blood suckers, the Undead are in for one hell of a ride.
Before diving into a Robyn Peterman story a reader must know a few things:
1. Her humor is crude, but lovely - and way over the top in all the best ways
2. Her heroine will have a dirty mouth and a dirty mind
3. Things will get a bit ridiculous - but they are supposed to

So, if that sounds like something up your alley, then you will love these books.  When Astrid goes to be hypnotized to stop smoking and is turned into a vampyre instead, she isn't sure the amazing body she ended up with was worth not being able to eat her favorite ice cream. When she's paired with a potty-mouth guardian angel and a fairy warrior that channels his inner Schwarzenegger, things start getting really good.

Astrid has a lot of decisions ahead of her - which vampyre house to join (read sorority) and whether or not she should fall for the handsome Ethan - or one of the many other beyond gorgeous vampyre men around her.

Lots of laughs, lots of action (in every possible way), and a good dose of raunchy humor. The only drawback was that I really disliked some of the side characters. And I think I was supposed to like them. Hopefully they'll work out in the long run because I really love the rest of the story.

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